I just want to know everything will be ok

I just want to feel that everything will be ok

i'm starting to not be able to deal with this

in my heart and in my head

I'm in ohio, kinda wishing I was home.  yea, I drove allan down here to surprise him...= ) i'm sucha awesome girlfriend. i had him thinking we were going to indiana to stay with my uncle.  it was cute.\

i miss my kitty, chloe that is why i want to go home, along with the fact that allan is being a jerk. but i wont get into that. 

I never got a chance to repost about chloe. so here's the scoop now: we got the blood work back and found out some horrible news.  my baby has kidney disease...and she's really sick, we have to put water in her through a needle every two days.  but the vet said she has one month to a year to live, usually for most cats in this sit. but she also said she might live up to three years because my chloe is such a strong cat.so im hopin she lives until i die, basically, that's how it's gonna be.

summer is awesome, but I also miss school.  It's just something that keeps you busy, cuz summer can get kinda boring.

On other news....my cat Chloe, most of you know. She's sick..  I'm sad.  she's my best cat ever(besides Daisy) and she is my buddy.  Her paw Pads, the big ones are all puffy and cracked looking cuz they are dry, but they get really big then they will pop and blood/puss will come out...it's gross, but mostly it really hurts her. she was limping the other day when we took her to the vet. The Vet thinks she might have diabetes. Which would be horrible b/c it's hard to take care of a cat with that.  My mom wants to put her down :'( *1000000000000000000000000.  I feel so bad for her right now. b/c of the infection in her paws she has a fever and her mouth has an infection, therefore, she doesn't eat her food.... she hasn't eaten in days.  : (.  hopefully she'll eat mussy food.

say a prayer for my kitty please!

awww. I love my boy!

he made me a romantic candle lit dinner out side with a fire going next to us.

so my grad party was a blast!!  pirate theme worked out very well. thank you to all of you who came!    the after party was hella fun too...muahahah. i love staying up till 6 am.   david passed out. hahaha.

on another note, i feel like i just don't know what's going on anymore, and i feel like my life is becoming routine.  I don't know.  I just don't feel wanted anymore, by any one for that matter.  just wish i could feel loved again, and like it was worth while.

AND another thing. my major i chose. yup. my mom doesn't seem to think i can or will do it. she basically laughed in my face about it then asked me if i was serious, then when i said, uh yea, she looked at me like i wouldn't be able to do that, because im stupid or it's to hard for me.

i need to get off these drugs im on(legal ones!). they're messing with me,and makin me depressed.   but once again NO one fuckin believes me!!! (the mother, yet again.)

FUCK everyone.